Tainted and sorrow
by Nako13yeh
Summary: What would happen if Break dies after overusing Mad Hatter? How would everyone else cope with his sudden death? Those links that bond them together are now torn apart, because they will find a dark truth within themselves they've never known before. Strength, trust, and loyalty will be tested. "You only realize you care about someone when they're gone." And it's too late.
1. Chapter 1 - Tainted Red

**REWRITE with additional details.**

* * *

**Chapter 1- Tainted red  
**

Break followed the noise echoing through the hall. He ran, and he couldn't stop. His breathing hitched and his balance was thrown off. He could feel the dampness of the walls and the cold breeze gently hitting his skin as he ran.

_That's enough, Lily. _

_He's dead. _

"Reim-san?" Break called, dreading the worst. "Please say something."

_Can't you see, Hatter? That he's already dead? _

And he found out that he was too late.

No.

No he couldn't, there wasn't a way.

_You've ruined all of my plans. _

Break leaned heavily on the wall, trying to calm his breathing. It was too late to save Reim, and too late to undo the damage done with his plans. It was no longer necessary to continue through, because every effort was gone. Break took a deep breath, and released his sword from its holder.

Break released the Hatter and turned to them with nothing but rage, hoping to achieve vengeance. The moment he released the Hatter, was the moment he stopped caring about his health.

What was the use if there was no longer a reason to keep going?

Continuing, would mean nothing anymore. He fought and continued to fight until he felt his feet moving to chase after them towards forest. Break found it funny that they needed space to fight, what was the point? Break was going to kill them.

He fought desperately but one of them managed to land a hit from underground.

"Even you can't predict a blow like that!" Screamed one of them.

Break sneered, wanting to tear them apart even more.

Those tainted hands, the tainted mind of his. Break felt so unworthy to be the living soul he was at the moment. He had accomplishments but to what extent was that? He felt that he needed to be punished, just like the punishment of taking his eyes out. He desperately wanted to make up for all of his mistakes, to pay for his crimes.

What better way than to be a hero?

He had his wish, his body was withering like a leaf that falls in autumn. He was happy to be able to gain such kind friends, despite using them as bait. He never liked sad endings. He never did, because those unhappy ones were turned to good ones.

**_He's done so much for everyone but himself. _**

Most of us do, don't we?

Because we love those people enough to sacrifice our own happiness. So we get to see them smile, be happy for once and in turn, it will make us happy, because knowing that you made someones day, is the best gift you could ever receive.

Has he ever done things for himself? Maybe so, who knows? Not even he knows what he's done to make up for everything.

It feels as if it's not enough.

Such a tainted life, full of grief and sorrow. Those scars in his life, the memories of the past, they could never be changed. Not anymore. It has already been done and it was very shallow, and yet hard to reach.

His answer?

Was to give up, yet do something for someone.

To make it easier for them.

_"I'm sorry Reim-san." _Break coughed up more blood.

Break released the Hatter again, this time, to its full capacity.

_"I wonder who will die first, me or them?" _

He felt cold, and the world was spinning. Everything happened in a blur, and though unable to see, he felt as if he could. It happened so fast, that his body had only reacted.

This is the moment that everyone asks questions.

But now, no questions should be asked yet, because this moment, was Break's. As he fell to the ground, and heard faint noises in the background, he felt at peace. Despite hearing the echoing noise of memories flooding through him. The cold was gone, and he was embraced with warmth.

He wanted to pretend, to hear everyone call out his name.

Pretend to _see_ them smiling, one last time.

He lost the sense of touch, but he felt so free and he didn't care that his time was up. It felt great, the warmth, the embrace was beautiful. The things he pledged to do were unfinished, yet he could imagine them continuing on his mission.

Now he would rest.

Break didn't feel tired anymore.

He felt free.

Now he could simply close his eyes, as those memories will be remembered once more. He smiled, happily. Even if he has to leave his friends, he knew it wasn't over.

They would still be together even in their departure.

Darkness and silence were now his closest friends, as his real friends were in that light that was escaping him.

* * *

**oOo**

You've seen the questions, you've read them, now do you know the answer?

And the question to be asked, is what if they were all too late? That none of them knew the consequences of being there for each other. That none of these characters knew the hardship someone else would take because they chose another decision.

It would lead to another story.

Another ending.

Let it be for the better, or for the worst.

We only have one question to ask, and that is the questions of _What if's__? _Because what else is there to ask when that is the only question we need an answer to. Every beginning has to end, and every alternate ending begins from somewhere.

So...

What if Gilbert chose to stay by his master's side to help him get Alice back?

Why?

Perhaps Vincent managed to convince Gilbert not go and to think on who the important one was. Oz and Alice? Or the Hatter, that was more than capable to handle them? Perhaps Gilbert got lost in his trail of thoughts that he didn't get to the conclusion of figuring out Break's condition. Or maybe Echo was forced not to tell Gil of the Hatter fighting the Baskerville's outside.

Gilbert wasn't told to watch out for Vincent, he remained ignorant of his brother's deeds. Listening to him, when in fact, he should only try and listen to his own thoughts.

Anything could have happened.

Oz and Alice had the help they needed, and were saved.

Isla Yura was dead, and they won.

Eliot wasn't as lucky, the contract was already there and when his own death broke his servant Leo, the darkness fell to Oz and the rest. They grieved silently, yes, but it was too late and they had to escape as quickly as they could.

But to where?

"USE RAVEN!" Oz screamed, as the place began to tremble.

Gil had no choice, he embraced everyone and brought them close. Oz, Alice, Vincent, Echo and the trembling Leo. Gil had brought them to their safety.

Now, where was Sharon, Reim and Break?

Reim?

Reim woke up, didn't he?

And if he limped to where he thought Break was, then he might be able to see him off and tell him that it was okay. Faintly, he could hear Break's voice calling out to him, but he was in deep sleep, paralyzed to the world around him.

Thanks to March Hare.

Reim limped as quickly as he could, but it was too late.

Some of the trees were slashed to pieces, most of them were stabbed, probably due to the fight that occurred. Reim saw dust and blood red capes of one of the Baskerville's. It was that guy, what's his name? Fang? Break killed him.

But where was Lily? What about the other Baskerville's?

Reim saw blood, trailing away from the forest.

Break must've severely wounded the Baskerville's, leading them into a run. Knowing Mad Hatter's skills, the Baskerville's wouldn't last long. Wounded, it would be hard to fight and it will buy Pandora a great lot of time to think of a plan to stop them.

"Xerx?" He whispered.

Reim embraced himself, doing his best to balance himself as he went a little further into the forest. He turned to look back, watching the mansion burn, but he was determined to look for Break before he passed out. And yet here he was, unable to process the event that occurred.

Unable to accept the truth.

"Xerx? Oh no... No! No!"

He was better off as a blind person.

Reim didn't want to see.

He wanted to forget this.

Break lay there, blood everywhere.

"Xerxes?!" He called.

_Nothing._

No help had came to aid his friend in the battle, and he was outnumbered. He was sick, and he had overused his power, he had no help and no one was able to tell him otherwise.

He died knowing that Reim died too.

But that was just a farce.

"NOOO!" Reim screamed. "Please, no! Xerxes? Wake up."

Break remained silent on the ground.

"Y-you moron!" He cried, dropping to his knees beside his friend. "Why did you do this?"

Break lay there bleeding from the open wound on his side, a great stab to his chest had ended him. Reim noticed bite marks on his arm and he could also see the blood dripping down of Break's mouth. Reim could feel tears form in his eyes and they fell.

He felt so hopeless now.

Reim brushed his trembling fingers to Break's hair, draping over his eyes. They seem so peaceful, despite the strain on the body. Reim felt like he was choking, to see Break like this.

His friend was gone.

He touched Break's hand, trying to move him, hoping that this was just a joke.

But it was too _real _and it _hurt. _

Now it was true, that people stumble and fall, and that it would have never happened if he had someone to help him. Reim didn't want Break to carry the burden alone, and now, everything Break worked for was gone.

What about that wish of his?

"Please wake up."

What would Sharon say?

"Xerxes, wake up, come on."

See, so many questions left unanswered.

"I'm still alive, you idiot." Reim cried, voice cracking. "You shouldn't have done this. You didn't have to."

_Nothing. _

"Is this the redemption you want?"

The depression strained Reim's body even more, and he couldn't help but feel his vision darken at the sides. Reim heard someone rushing towards them, and he could only hold Break's lifeless hand. The darkness swallowed him whole.

The Baskerville's were gone.

Break was lifeless.

And Sharon, could she have gotten lost in helping everyone else?

Too busy trying to help keep the peace and be a woman herself. So she could be the good Reinsworth, to try and be useful that she focused more and only realized later on that her efforts saved many, but not all?

When she got those that needed help, she decided to head outside to find Break and the rest.

Only to lead towards a scene that she never thought she would one day witness. Stricken by grief, falling to her knees and staring wildly at the bloody scene. Reim and Break were lying together, looking dead to the world. She didn't want to approach them, and so she screamed as hard as she could.

She could've predicted this.

She _should've _predicted this.

Now it was too late.

She continued to scream until her lungs felt as if it was about to give out. She could hear faint voices in the distance, but the grief was too much for her. Little did she know it was Oz and the others. Even they couldn't handle the situation.

Vincent though, just stared in disappointment, despite having a hate for Break, he somewhat enjoyed using the Hatter for purposes that would benefit the Baskerville's and him. Alice was crying with Sharon, as Oz stood there in shock. Gil felt a little guilty, he went up to the two, dreading the worst and preparing himself.

"He's alive!" Gil screamed, trying to lift Reim.

"B-break?" Oz stepped forward, voice cracking.

Gil lowered his head and shook it.

How will they cope now that he's gone? The clues they had, who would help solve them? To do things on their own, without someone bothering them, nobody to steal their cake. No one to make them smile or irritate them, to make a noise when the silence was threatening.

No...

It was gone.

They never even got to say goodbye.

* * *

**oOo**

**To Be Continued...**

**I rather enjoyed recreating this. I hope you enjoyed.**


	2. Chapter 2 - The Grief of Milady

**Chapter 2 - The Grief of Milady  
**

What could've happened? What had gone wrong? Nobody could answer these questions let alone, could Sharon answer these on her own. The twisted thoughts continue to unravel, and it was causing her to lose all sense in her. The grief stuck too much, and they had given Break a proper funeral only weeks ago.

But it was still there, the pain and the confusion.

Questions filled inside her head.

Why wasn't she there for him?

If she was, would she have been help?

Or would she have been a burden?

The blood that scattered through the forest, Sharon could still see it everywhere. She found it hard to sleep, because Break wasn't just a servant, or just part of the Reinsworth household. He was family to her, her big brother and now he was gone.

She was glad of course, that Reim was alive, now resting in another room still unconscious, unable to wake up from the stress done to his body, but he was recovering just fine.

_"It hurts." _

Sharon stared out the window, sitting by the table, watching as the storm blurred the view outside. The rain was endless, as if it was also crying. Sharon wanted to pretend that it was the Will of Abyss, sharing her grief of his death, but she wasn't sure.

It must be coincidence.

Yes.

It hurts, so much.

Sharon and the others had gone back to their normal lives, trying to get past the fact that the happy clown in their lives was gone forever. Never to return. The remembrance they had left was his cane, that they did not want to touch, blood still coating it.

Break was absent for weeks.

They wanted to fool themselves into thinking that he was still around, that Break's spirit still lingered for he had unfinished business. But that wasn't the case, and all they could do was lie to themselves.

_"Break wouldn't want us to be sad." _Sharon clenched her hand into a fist. _"What would he say, if he saw us this way?" _

Sharon cried, feeling as if the tears could no longer be shed, because they were so dry by now. She wouldn't stop crying and even if Sheryl tried her best to calm her granddaughter down, nothing would stop her. Sheryl tried everything but it was in vain, Sharon only wanted to be left in peace.

Even Duke Barma sends his condolence.

Break never even said goodbye.

Sharon stood up fiercely and picked up a vase full flowers seated neatly on the table and threw it towards the wall.

It shattered.

The water spread to the carpet and the flowers sat there drenched and dark. Black flowers from Pandora, black flowers that symbolizes death.

She doesn't want a reminder.

She wants to forget.

She fell to her knees, watching the shattered piece lying there. She hid her tears, lowering her head. Loud sobs escaped her lips. It was so painful, why couldn't she move on with everything that has happened? She missed him, her big brother, her Xerxes-nii. She loved him so much for them to part their ways.

She hated it the fact that Break was so selfish.

Yet in turn, she was the one who was selfish.

She wanted Break to be by her side, when in fact, failing to notice that Break had already been tired of the world around him. The man only wanted peace from the burdens he was carrying and he was only afraid of death. Now, it didn't look like the case, Break had finally accepted his end and that's why it hurt so much.

It wasn't a happy ending at all.

"I thought you hated sad endings!" Sharon cried, screaming. "I thought you hated seeing us cry! SO WHY?!"

Some people went into the room to see her crying on the floor with shattered pieces of the vase surrounding her. It was Oz, Alice and Gil. Sharon knew that she wasn't the only one grieving. They lost someone so dear to them, that there was no one in the world that could replace him.

He was irreplaceable.

The others felt pain as well, but not so much as hers. Or at least, that's what she thinks. She believes that her grief is greater, since they don't openly express theirs. But she was wrong, they were despairing just as much as she was and it was horrible.

Oz and the others felt that they need not disturb her, so they left her there, _crying _and_ alone._

Sharon and Break have been together since Sharon was six.

She would give him daisies and he would keep it in his pocket, which normally Sharon would correct him. The flower was for holding not for keeping like that. He would have ruined the flower. She'd run with him, play dolls, play hide and seek. Break would always win, Sharon could never find the man's hiding place.

The one things she could never forget about him was his smile.

No matter how much Break feels pain, he'd smile it off. Sharon would like to imitate him right now, she was in pain, but only break could pull off a smile at times like these.

The look on Sharon's face was mesmerizing. Those tears kept on flowing down to her cheeks and filling up once more to pour it out.

She never felt such grief before.

Not even for her mother.

Her mother's death was understandable and she was prepared to continue on with the duty of being the next Reinsworth, so her mother would be proud of her.

She wished that it should be her lying there lifeless. It should be her that's feeling all those burdening tasks. How come Break didn't let them help him with those burdens before? How come the man always stayed strong whenever everything else was toppling down on him?

Such a strong willed person.

Why couldn't Sharon have been that way? She would love that right now.

Pain was taking over, that burden to finish what was left for them to continue. She needed help but sadly, she knew she couldn't do it. She always needed help. She couldn't do it on her own. People were there to aid her in her time of need but when others ask, all she could do was wait and let others take over.

That was what she thought.

She was useless.

Break would be there to protect her. The time where Vincent had kidnapped her and there was nothing else she could do. She just sat there and watched as all of Break's hard work, was destroyed in mere seconds.

She wanted to be useful, but what could she have done?

She would have only gotten in the way. The only things she could do were to open doors in and out of the abyss and crying. She hated herself for being that kind of person, not really accepting her duty, her vows and promises. She was mature now, mature enough to help her big brother.

What did she do?

Those times wasted, she knew she could have done more. Done more with Break's health. She should have noticed it before. That Break had been blind. The others did, Oz did and so did Liam, but leaving her out, because they know she couldn't accept it.

That she would only tear up and cry.

Yes.

Cry.

That is all she could do.

But she stayed strong when break told her the truth; she made things the best for what they were. Yet, everything didn't go according to plan. Things twisted its real course. Everything else ended up different from what anyone ever expected the outcome to be.

"It's never a happy ending without you, Xerxes-nii."

As heavy tears flowed down her cheeks once more, she stood up and took something from under her pillow.

It was a blue doll with locks of hair and a ribbon. She couldn't sleep without it, it was a memory that cannot be left behind. It was Break's doll, the doll he'd fool people around with. It was full of memories of him that she would take it anywhere with her just so that Break's memory cannot be forgotten.

She laid there on her bed hugging the blue doll which Break called Emily.

How she missed him so much.

_"Ah, it was Emily's fault?" Break grinned. "Eh!? Me? It's you! Now now Emily!"_

_"You are annoying."_

"For you? Don't mistake it that way, milady. I only did it because your mother, Shelly-sama, will kill me."

"I'm not very good at dancing."

"I'm blind, Milady."

She cried at that last part, he was blind. He was sick, he was weak. He hid all of those from her, but it made her happy didn't it. Maybe having him around was happy at times of grief. Mainly because he were there to ease things, but with his absence it was painful, sad and lonely.

Without him, it can never be a happy ending.

"It is an ending, isn't it?" Sharon stared at the ceiling. "But do I look happy?"

Sharon covered herself with her bed sheets, she still held Emily close to her heart. She cried once more, it never stops. It can never stop since he's gone. She will always shed tears for him, it means that she can never forget him.

"Xerxes-nii...I miss you!"

Under those covers, was a woman that loved her servant.

Loved her brother... And misses him dearly.

* * *

**oOo**

**To be continued...  
**

**This story has me in tears again. I hope you enjoyed.**


	3. Chapter 3 - Gilbert's Regrets

**Chapter 3 - Gilbert's regrets**

Gilbert felt the need not to express his feelings on the subject of Break and Elliot's death. He didn't want to think about it, because he also wanted to forget and think of it as nothing but a dream. Duke Barma was kind enough from Sheryl's wishes to give them time off.

Two months of time off, was too much.

It had been a month and a half now, and still, everything was going downhill, despite their time off. They couldn't work and they couldn't accept it. Even Pandora seemed to be grieving the loss of Hatter, because Break was one of the most powerful in Pandora.

And he was the only one to contract Mad Hatter.

They mourned too, but Pandora went back to business as usual.

"It's strange isn't it?" Oz turned to him. "That people are acting normal, when in fact, they're all somewhat grieving."

Gil stared at Oz, who stood there staring at him.

"We're just the same as them."

"Only worse." Alice mumbled, eyes red from crying.

"It'll pass." Oz smiled forcefully. "One day we'll move on."

The people, however, still remained to be passive about the situation.

It was painful, especially for Reim, who he considered Break as a close friend. Reim had woken up a week ago, wanting to get right back to work immediately in order to drown out the thoughts and avoid the situation entirely.

"Reim-san!" Oz wanted to talk to him, badly.

"Oz, I don't think you should-"

"Gil, we have to." Oz looked at him.

"O-okay." Gil lowered his head in defeat. "Oz."

"Reim-san! Hold on!"

"P-please O-oz-sama." Reim averted his gaze. "P-please, I should go."

"You should stop doing this."

"I-I d-don't see what's wrong in doing my job." His smile, strained.

"Please stop pretending, Reim-san." Oz answered sadly. "Break wouldn't want you to be like this."

"I don't think I understand what you mean?"

_"What do you mean, Oz?" _Gil clenched his fist. _"I don't get it."  
_

"Please Oz-sama." Reim bit his lips. "I don't want to talk about Xerx."

"Y-you don't have to bottle it in!" Oz felt tears forming in his eyes. "W-we understand what you're going through."

"I-I'm not sure that you do." Reim choked in his words. "I've known him for so long, Oz-sama."

When Oz had cornered him, Reim broke down and told them everything he was feeling from day one of Break coming into their lives to the moment it had ended. Gil could see the look on his face when he continued to grieve, wanting to make up for everything that had happened.

Now, Gil felt guilty.

His main reason, was the fact that he wasn't able to help out when he was needed the most. And he felt guilt because not helping might have been the reason that Break wasn't able to survive. If he had thought more about who he wanted to protect and who he had to help out, then none of this would have happened.

He was a great key factor in this, and he regrets it.

Oz had let him go, wanting to be alone for a while, and he accepted Oz's response.

Truth be told, that Gil needed the break as well.

It was hard for him because he wasn't allowed to cry yet. He wasn't allowed to shed a tear if his master hasn't expressed his own feelings. It was corroding his own body and harming his health. He hadn't been able to sleep, because he thought about the fire and how tragic it was.

It felt so familiar and yet he couldn't remember.

Vincent was trying to cheer him up as well, but none of it was working and it only worsened his situation. So he stayed away from the man that Break truly despised, even though Break rarely showed it. He wanted to try and understand what was wrong with the relationship Vincent and Break had.

They hated each other, and he wanted to respect that.

Gil went back to one of the living rooms they usually stayed at. Sharon was with her grandmother, while Oz and Alice were together.

Everyone else was busy and now, he was all alone.

Gil looked at one of Break's candy wrapper that was sitting on the table. He really didn't want to talk to anyone at all, but the world was forcing him to communicate and keep going. He just wanted to lie down and blame himself for every little thing.

He couldn't even bring himself to look at Oz in the eye.

And everything he sees seems like a constant reminder of Break.

10 years they've known each other.

10 years of trust?

And it all comes to this.

* * *

**oOo  
**

He went to his bed and curled up with the pillow, making sure that the door was locked before he could try and be emotional about it. Oz had expressed his grief already, and though it was but silent tears, Gil knew that it was his time to mourn.

He thought that the pain would go away, but as soon as grief had settled, he was completely wrong. He hated Break whenever he was being annoying, whenever he was teasing and wished he could kill him, but he could never do that.

Break made him who he was today.

He was the reason Gil started cooking.

_"Break seems a little too thin! He- He needs to eat more." _

Break encouraged him to go to the Nightray's.

_"Be my left eye, and report to me what you see." _

Break teased him a lot.

He gave him confidence, put him through tough times but in the end, helped him get better. If Break never came to help him when his master disappeared into the abyss, he would have lost his path forever and wouldn't be standing by Oz's side.

There were so many things that Break has done for him, extraordinary things that nobody else could and he thankful for it. But not an ounce of thank you was spoken to Break.

Why is that during the last time you meet someone, you end up regretting not having told the important words that needed to be said?

Why is it like that?

For some reasons he enjoyed having Break around there to cheer him up, even if the cheering up turns to irritation; he was always there to guide him.

"Why couldn't you have stayed?" Gil clenched his fist and punched the pillow. "I could have helped you. Why couldn't you have stayed longer?"

Why?

Why is that?

Was it because of the what if's?

Nobody could have helped the Hatter, everyone knew that.

Break was dying the moment he signed his contract with the Hatter. Everyone grieved, but no matter what kind of cheering up someone does, they can't help but feel the place so _quiet. _

_So silent._

_So _piercing.

"I could have helped you." He sighed, tears escaping his eye. "You idiot."He looked around his room, and the more things that he sees, the more the recollection of memory returns. He looked at the mirror that almost broke when Break popped out of nowhere and scared him. The table reminded him of how messy Break got when he threw candy wrappers on it and left it for Gil to that would never be able to see that smile again in his was looking for someone to protect and insisted that Oz needed his help but Oz was old enough to fight his own battles. And that stupid rabbit, they had each , needed his was that wish Break talked about with the Will of Abyss?No one will ever now, Break was done even fulfilling what he had to, it was something he was living for, wasn't it?"I should have said thank you." Gil bit his broke down, sobbing into his pillow, unable to stop the tears."What kind of a friend am I?" Gil threw his pillow. "Damn it, you could have waited."_"Using that someone else, is just an excuse." _Gil heard Break's voice in the back of his head. _"Yes, it can make you stronger, but never let it cloud whatever it is 'you' yourself have a goal in." _

What would become of him now that Break's gone?

He had no one else to guide him.

No one to look up to.

He missed him so much that he couldn't admit it even to himself.

He had pride in himself, but as long as he has, he will never move on.

Gilbert wanted to set aside his stubbornness. He was sure that Break wanted him to ease up and loosen up a bit. Break wanted him to go down his own path and seek his own triumphs and down falls.

_"Listen Gilbert-kun, you must remember your priorities. Neh~"_

Those were the words that Break spoke to him as a child.

He knew now what his priorities were.

But...

Who was he to protect?

Should he still serve Oz?

What was he going to do?

"You're always confusing me with your words Break!" He stiffly laughed. "You stupid clown."

The cold air broke into the room and he slightly shivered.

"Don't worry Break. I'll think of something."

* * *

**TBC**

**:3  
**


	4. Chapter 4 - The Fall

**Chapter 4 - The Fall  
**

"Oz, are you feeling okay?" Alice asked with a worried expression.

The two of them were out in the garden, seated by the fountain and occasionally staring at their own reflection. Nobody wanted to hang out anymore. Sharon stayed in her room most of the time, or occasionally went to Pandora with her grandmother in order to settle some feuds. Gil locked himself in his room as well, but whenever Oz called for him, the servant would always follow the master.

"I'm fine Alice." Oz smiled sadly." Thanks for worrying."

"Do you still think about the clow- I mean, Break." Alice pouted at her slip-up.

After Break died, Alice had started calling him by the name everyone knew. It sounded unfair for her to call him a clown even when he's dead. So she thought that Break might be happier in the after life, knowing that she finally calls him by his name. Alice wanted to make it known that she also cared, in her own strange way.

"Yes, Alice." Oz moved his hand through the water. "I'm still thinking about him."

"Oh." She looked away, hesitantly talking. "Me too."

"Nobody can really stop thinking about him. Reim-san and Sharon has it worse than any of us."

"Four eyes and Sharon." Alice sighed. "Four eyes has been working himself to death, hasn't he?"

"I wish he wouldn't." Oz continued to play with the water. "Everyone's trying to stop Reim-san, but he just wouldn't do anything else except his work. He keeps doing missions, small inside jobs, getting information and occasionally some on field. And even Duke Barma is frightened for him. He's become more determined than ever."

"There's no helping it."

"You're right, but don't you think that if Break was alive and he saw all of us like this, he'll do something?"

"I think so."

"He will. I know it." Oz chuckled sadly.

"What if we do something to cheer up everyone?" Alice suggested. "Like a meat party."

"That's a great idea, Alice!" Oz grinned. "We should try and cheer everyone up."

"With meat? They said that a meat party doesn't exist." Alice stared at Oz, as he laughed a little.

"Not really with meat, Alice. But your idea is still great."

Alice felt all bubbly inside, the first time in a long while since Break's death and it was something. Oz was feeling it too. It wasn't easy, not to mourn for a death of a good friend, but it was slowly getting better. Sure it was missing the key ingredient and that was Break's strange personality. They miss him jumping to their rescue, or him popping up anywhere and dishing out comments.

It was suddenly, quiet.

"We should start with ourselves first." Oz thought.

"Us?"

Suddenly the wind picks up and Alice held her hair down, while Oz looked up at the trees swaying back and forth. The leaves began to blow up towards the sky, making the scenery so beautiful and worthwhile. Oz gazed at the leaves dropping.

"It's already fall."

"Fall? Is that good? Something to eat?"

"That's when the flowers and leaves die so they can make a new one." Oz explained to Alice rather gently. "It reminds me of something I read once. Once someone dies another lives. It's not meant to replace anyone, it's just how the cycle of life goes. There is always someone born from death."

"Does that mean the Clo- I mean Break, is helping make someone live?"

"Kinda..." Oz laughed and patted Alice.

"How did it go?"

"Life is like a tree." Oz chuckled. "Spring comes and a beautiful journey springs anew. Summer hits, the hardships we go through. Winter is the time when things are often feared, and soon fall comes, where everything breaks."

"I don't like this story."

"It's suppose to be inspiring, Alice."

"How?"

"Because it's a cycle. When fall comes, and everything breaks, it still looks beautiful." Oz points at the leaves being blown by the wind. "See? After Fall, Spring happens and it's beautiful again."

"That's nice." Alice smiled, and patted Oz's head."Maybe this is for the best." Oz sadly whispered. "Now, Break won't have to feel so much pain. He won't have to keep struggling."

"But he never finished what he wanted to do, remember?"

"I'm not sure what I'm trying to say." Oz wiped the tears from his eyes.

"It's okay to cry."

"Break may be done in this life, but I saw him smile before he died. There was sadness, and I'm not sure why, but I think it's because he never had the time to tell us anything he wanted to say. I think he missed us as much as we miss him."

"Is he alone somewhere?" Alice felt her stomach growl but ignored it. "He'll feel even more sad when he sees us grieving."

"You're right, Alice."

"Hmm?" Alice blushed."We should start to make things right again. Break doesn't like us living in the past enough for it to take over our lives. We still have so many things to do, like finding out where Vincent and Reo are."

"That's right, we can't let the Clown's work go to waste!" Alice stood on the ledge of the fountain and spun. "So where do we start first?"

"I have no clue." Oz giggled. "But I'm sure things would go back to normal soon."

Suddenly a white rose fell from the sky and fell right on the water, floating there. Oz and Alice blinked and looked at each other. Alice bent down to stare at it while Oz picked it up and twirled the pretty white flower and smiled, placing it on Alice's hair right above her right ear.

"What is this?" Alice blushed, pouting.

"I think it's a sign that Break agrees with us."

"Really?" Alice played with her fingers. "Oz?"

"Yes, Alice?" Oz turned, a little distracted. "What is it?"

"Can I talk to... him?"

"Hmm?" Oz took a while to understand, and when it hit him. "Oh! Don't worry, I think he will hear you no matter where we are."

"Hey CLOWN!" Alice stood up, grinning in triumph. "I will help Oz make things right and we will finish this once and for all! You efforts won't be in vain! We can take on anything thrown at us!"

"You hear that Break?!" Oz stood up, shouting with her. "We're going to finish this!"

"What are you two doing!?" Someone shouted from a distance. "It's not safe!"

"It's Papa!" Oz laughed.

"What do you mean papa?" Gil rushed. "You might slip!"

"Seaweed-head!" Alice grinned. "Look Oz, he's out of his room!"

Gil was finally out of his room, running towards the two of them. Alice suddenly grabbed Oz and they both tumbled to the water together, and Oz couldn't help but laugh. "You're both going to catch a cold." Gil's eyes were red, but Oz was glad he was here with them. The servant began to lecture Oz and Alice and tried to dry both of them off.

Oz smiled as he and Alice stood up and walked away from the fountain. Oz laughed hard, and was glad that the water was masking his tears. No one could see him like that, and he was glad that he knew things would get better soon.

Fall was beautiful, but very has a limit and every life has to end, but that is the way we live.

"Come on Alice, Gil, let's go back inside."

* * *

**oOo**

Sharon was staring out the window, spinning a white rose in between her fingers. She smiled sadly, and yet at the same time, happily watching the three outside. She couldn't help but feel so lost in that happiness that it took a moment to realize she was forgetting something.

"You don't have to keep mourning." Reim entered the door silently.

"You've been mourning since, Reim-san." She turned to him, surprised.

"I found it while I was walking through Pandora earlier." Reim smiled, holding out a white flower, placing it into a book. "I should keep it somewhere safe."

"It just flew in." Sharon tried to explain. "How are you, Reim-san? We haven't seen you in a while."

"I'm tired." Reim leaned back from the window, like Break used to do. "Tired of crying, tired of shutting myself out in all the work. I hate it when people look at me and start pitying me. At work I keep hearing a few colleagues talk about him and I can't help but be mad about it."

"You're not alone in this."

"And neither are you." Reim sighed. "I can't help but feel he's about to pop up from somewhere and bother me into doing his paperwork. I just, can't help but wait even though there's nothing to wait for."

"Grandmother, told me that it's fine to cry." Sharon closed her eyes. "But too much can be hurtful too."

"I want to settle this, settle everything, Sharon." Reim breathed with determination. "I'm so sick of pity, sadness and the tears."

"Aren't we all tired, Reim-san?" She giggled gently.

"I miss him." Reim wiped the tears from his eyes, not bothering to move his glasses. "I still feel like he's somewhere in the room. I want to hear the voice of my best friend."

"Don't, Reim-san." Sharon breathed. "Xerxes-nii, wouldn't want to hear our sadness."

"You're right." He chuckled. "Xerxes used to say he isn't good with emotions."

"I know." She giggled with him. "I miss him too. It's just sad..."

"It is." Reim closed his eyes. "We never got to say goodbye to him. And he never... her wish... the will of Abyss... I wonder what it was."

"He took it to his grave as well."

"He was struggling for so long, it shouldn't have ended up like this." Reim shook his head. "Xerxes wouldn't want us to be like this."

"And I think everyone else has figured that out by now." She pointed. "Look outside."

"Really?" He said, looking out the window.

"Do you see it? On Alice-san's hair?"

_The White Rose. _

"I can't believe we all have one." Reim chuckled, feeling relieved. "Or at least that's what I assume. Do you think Gilbert-sama has one?"

"I'm sure." Sharon sat by the table and sipped some tea, as she smiled at Reim, who poured himself a cup. They needed to settle this once and for all. It would be too much if they let it continue to ruin their lives.

This wasn't living anymore and they had to find a solution.

* * *

**oOo**

Oz pulled both of them inside and the three got into a secure room. They were shocked to see Sharon and Reim sitting there, looking like they just had a really long conversation.

"Oh my, why are you two wet?" Sharon questioned innocently.

"Oh let me." Reim walked to the closet and gave them towels to dry themselves.

"Thank you." Oz grinned.

"I knew I was right about going outside." Gil sighed. "What were you two doing?"

"Oz and I were just talking to the Clown!" Alice grinned as she dried herself.

_Silence.  
_

"Talking to him?" Sharon blinked.

"Yeah! It's like a sign, and Oz said that he's probably watching and listening!" Alice shook her head, earning a glare from Gil. "Besides, shouting and calling him Clown is fine!"

"Are you guys okay?" Oz said. "We're sorry for bringing it up."

"No, no..." Reim smiled. "Not at all. It is... about time we talked about this."

"Reim-san and I were just talking about it earlier." Sharon wiped her eyes gently.

"I'm sorry everyone." Reim bowed. "I shouldn't have acted the way I did. I just... We've known Xerx for many years and to not be able to say goodbye-"

"I don't think Break will like it if we keep doing this." Oz smiled, getting straight to the point. "Are you sure you guys are alright to talk about this?"

"Maybe. Maybe not. But there is no harm in trying." Sharon smiled sadly and looked at Alice. "That rose, Alice-san, where did you get it?"

"The Clown gave it to me!" Alice jumped, shocking everyone. "Or at least I think it did. It blew right on the fountain Oz and I were at and Oz gave it to me."

"Is that so?" Reim pulled out the same flower from a book. "A white rose, it rarely grows anywhere, and to find one near the Reinsworth mansion is, strange. At Fall too."

"I found it blown through the window." Sharon pointed at the flower on the table next to her tea. "I realized something when this flower flew into my room. It reminded me that Break hated crying. I know that he wants me to be brave someday, and I want to start now."

"A white flower flew into my room as well." Gilbert smiled, pulling a white flower out of his pocket.

"Break must be telling us not to grieve his death. " Oz smiled.

Everyone _listened..._

"He wants us to continue what were living for. He doesn't want us to live like we're dead. He wants us to live like we're alive. Break may be dead but he's still living by our side, through our memories."

"Yeah!" Alice pointed at her heart. "He's living in here."

"He lives in all of us." Reim smiled at them sadly holding the white flower in his hand.

"He's an idiot to be doing something like this but," Oz laughed. "At least it got us back to who we are."

"Now that we're done, let's not grieve anymore okay!?" Alice stood on top of the chair. "I want a meat party!"

"Get down from there Stupid rabbit!" Gil shouted, pulling her.

"Let me go Seaweed-head!"

"We still have important matters to discuss." Sharon gently said. "We- we aren't finished yet- Hold on-"

"There's something concerning the Baskerville's and Vincent Nightray-" Reim mumbled, completely ignored as the two argued.

"Grandmother told me something important as well." Sharon pouted. "It's important that you need to know-"

"Hey you two..." Oz sweat-dropped. "We just-"

"Hey CLOWN you hear me!?" Alice shouted. "We're not going to give up! This isn't the last of us! WE'RE GOING TO FIGHT TIL THE END!"

"Don't shout you stupid Rabbit!"

"I'll shout however I want."

"Please, stop, you two."

_"My my... back to normal at last. I'm so glad." _A voice echoed through the wind as fall continued. _"Hehehe... may my last will be strength to guide you." _

Reim couldn't help but feel something, so he turned to the window to stare at the leaves flying through the wind. He opened the window and a soft breeze entered, and everyone noticed this, they grew silent and Reim could only smile.

"It's a good day." He said. "Like those sunny days."

_"I miss that." _The voice happily echoed. _"Those bright sunny days."_

* * *

**oOo**

***Cries harder* **

**I hope you enjoyed the trip on the feelstrain. xD  
Please review and tell me what you think.**

**Thank you for sticking with me.**


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